I have to admit, it never crossed my mind that I would be giving a farewell talk before I leave and serve a mission, but I can honestly say that I have never been this excited to give a talk. What a beautiful morning to be speaking to all of my friends and family, both biological and ward. I love all of you so much!
The topic that Bishop Neilson so lovingly bestowed upon me was the Atonement. So thank you bishop for giving me such a simple topic. I actually am so grateful to have this topic. It’s one that I have grown to love because of the endless fountain of knowledge it gives. There’s so much to cover with the topic of the Atonement so as I pondered how in the world I was going to fit it into 15 minutes, I came to the conclusion that I will do the best I can.
One of my favorite quotes from Elder Jeffery R Holland says “He has, He reminds us, “graven thee upon the palms of my hands”. Considering the incomprehensible cost of the crucifixion, Christ is not going to turn His back on us now.” Close quote.
With the creation of the plan of salvation, Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ knew that we would make mistakes. Agency was the only way for the pan to work and with agency comes trial and error. With that knowledge, they created a way and made it possible for us to right our wrongs. Repentance through the atonement is one of the essentials for us to return to our Father in Heaven and we are lucky enough to have a plethora of examples of how far the light of the atonement shines. One of my favorite examples is that of Alma the Younger. Talk about a rebel. He was quite the troublemaker and that’s putting it lightly. He’s what we would like to call a “problem child”.
With his father at his wit's end, he had given up trying to restrain him; to teach him. All he could resort to doing was pray. And boy, did praying work. It took an angel to come to Alma the Younger to have him realize the heartache his actions were causing; not only on himself but to those he had wronged. He became weak and dumb (his words, not mine) as he fell into a state of shock. He cried to the Lord for forgiveness and to change his ways. His heart was broken and his spirit yearned to be uplifted and fed. Because of the Saviors’ sacrifice and because of His atonement, his wrongs were made right.
At a young age, it seemed to me almost too good to be true that all that is asked of us is a broken heart and contrite spirit and our slate is wiped clean; our sins forgiven. But never have I felt closer to Alma the Younger than when I, too, had made choices that left me without the comfort of the Holy Ghost. At one point in my life, I had decided that I had life all figured out and I no longer needed the church; I could do it all by myself. I found myself knee deep in a life where every day I had to wake up and convince myself that I was happy; that my days were just as bright as they were when I was keeping the commandments.
It wasn’t until I made the decision to turn to the Savior and remove myself from living the life I thought made me happy that I truly understood the power of the Atonement. It was a long journey back. Like Alma the younger, I had to retrace my steps and right wrongs with others I had made. I had consequences for my actions, but the desire to become clean far outweighed the fear and pain and embarrassment of correcting my mistakes.
Even though the Atonement seems impossible to comprehend, Alma explains it and its effects simply in Mosiah 27:29.
The initial step forward can be scary and difficult. Admitting our weaknesses is something that we love just about as much as we love traffic or broken air conditioning or an extra-long Sacrament meeting talk. As painful as it is, it is possible to endure and when we make it through to the other side, it’s well worth the pain.
Some may feel that their sins are the one; the exact sin that is completely unforgivable. Their sin is the one thing that is exempt from the Atonement and they’re never going to be forgiven. Well, our general authorities have said numerous times where the line is truly drawn on forgivable and unforgivable.
President Boyd K. Packer said “Restoring what you cannot restore, healing the wound you cannot heal, fixing that which you broke and cannot fix is the very purpose of the atonement of Christ...I repeat, there is no habit, no addiction, no rebellion, no transgression, no apostasy, no crime exempted from the promise of complete forgiveness. That is the promise of the Atonement.” Close quote.
Jeffery R Holland promises us, “However late you think you are, however many chances you think you have missed, however many mistakes you feel you have made or talents you think you don’t have, or however far from home and family and God you feel you have traveled, I testify that you have not traveled beyond the reach of Devine Love. It is NOT POSSIBLE for you to sink lower than the infinite light of Christ’s Atonement shines.” Close quote.
As we journey through life, we will come across times that we will have the opportunity to turn to the Savior and His atonement. I know that when we make the choice to work with Him to make us whole, we will feel the peace of a no longer pained soul. What an incredible gift from our Heavenly Father.
When we sin, our sins can cause what I like to call a ripple effect. Not only are we suffering the consequences of our actions, but others can receive painful effects from our wrongdoings. Lots of times, heartache comes from no sin at all but merely from the trials and tribulations of life.
Before Christ died on the cross, He knelt in the garden in Gethsemane and suffered all manner of afflictions. We know that He suffered the pain we feel when we sin, but He also suffered life’s injustices for us.
He suffered the devastation of hearing a loved one has been diagnosed with a life-threatening condition.
He suffered the disappointment of watching a child, parent, or friend suffer with an addiction.
He suffered the sting of sadness of not getting asked to yet another school dance.
He suffered the confusion that comes with watching others consciously make harmful choices.
He suffered the emptiness of watching your last child move the last of their belongings out of the home.
He suffered the complete exhaustion of the continuous battles with a difficult child.
He suffered the embarrassment and guilt of losing a short-fused temper.
He suffered the hopelessness in the passing of another jobless year.
He suffered the loneliness of growing older without the one you planned to grow old with.
He suffered the empty arms and grief of infertility.
He suffered the frustration of putting all your effort into a party or activity that no one came to.
He suffered the anguish and heartbreak that comes with the divorce of a marriage.
He suffered the pain and devastation of the death of a cherished friend.
He suffered ALL manner of afflictions; even those we cannot wrap our minds around. He took it upon Himself to go through the feelings and emotions we feel so we would not have to do it alone.
In Mosiah 24, Amulon begins to prosecute Alma and his people to the point of threatening death to those who pray and call upon the Lord. Their afflictions became difficult, to say the least, and they began to become increasingly sad and beaten down with the heaviness of their trials. However, they used the glimmer of faith that they had and turned to the Lord anyways. In verses 12-15, it says…
The afflictions were not taken from them, nor did they miraculously appear in another land, far out of reach of their afflicters, but through acting on the faith they had in their hearts and the knowledge that the Lord would be with them, they called upon Him in desperation to help. He eased their burdens, made them light, and strengthened them in the ways they needed to endure to the end.
With our knowledge of the atonement and Christ’s suffering, we can turn to Him and pour out our hearts, and he will bless us with the strength and power needed to overcome whatever stands in our way. He’s been there. He’s felt it. He knows how to calm our troubled hearts and loves us enough to help ease our burden.
Sometimes, our prayers for help may not be answered in our time and in our way, but they will be answered in God’s time and in God’s way. We are still His children and He is still our Father. He has to allow growth to take place for us to develop the qualities we strive for and he has to allow us to taste of the bitter so that we can know of the sweet. As we continue to turn to Him and act on our faith in Jesus Christ and His Atonement, we will be able to face the trials and tribulations placed in our path with more strength, power, and peace in knowing that we are not doing it alone.
As part of the topic, the bishop invited me to talk about what I hope to learn more about the atonement on my mission. I thought, “Well, there’s always room for learning more about righting wrongs and making it through hard times. But what about when life is going good?”
David A. Bednar gave a great devotional at BYU-I in 2001 and beautifully explained why it’s important to have the Atonement even when we are well on our way on the covenant path; when we’re making the right choices and life seems to be A-Okay. He said, "We need to appreciate that the Lord desires, through His Atonement and by the power of the Holy Ghost, to live IN us—not only to direct us but also to empower us… Most of us clearly understand that the Atonement is for sinners. I am not so sure, however, that we know and understand that the Atonement is also for saints—for good men and women who are obedient and worthy and conscientious and who are striving to become better and serve more faithfully. I wonder if we mistakenly believe we must make the journey from good to better and become a saint all by ourselves through sheer grit, willpower, and discipline, and with our obviously limited capacities.
Brothers and sisters, the gospel of the Savior is not simply about avoiding bad in our lives; it also is essentially about doing and becoming good. And the Atonement provides help for us to overcome and avoid bad and to do and become good. There is help from the Savior for the entire journey of life—from bad to good to better and to change our very nature.” Close quote.
The choice to serve a mission did not come with a grand feeling of happiness and joy. In fact, my first response to the thought was “Absolutely not.” “I am the least qualified person to serve a mission.” “Only saints and the elite go on missions.” I felt completely inadequate. But I could not quiet the constant, and I’ll admit almost irritating, voice of the spirit urging me to talk to my bishop about starting my papers. So I made a deal. “I’ll start my papers but if I end up not feeling right about it, it’s not happening.”
My papers were finished in about 3 and a half hours. I was well on my way to serving a mission.
But I’m not a spiritually gifted teenager that had this burning desire to proclaim and preach. I was a terrified, second-guessing 22-year old that was still trying to make it to church on time!
As I have endured trials over the course of making the decision to serve a mission, I have grown a deeper understanding of the enabling power of the Atonement. Because I have made the decision to dedicate my time, effort, talents, and testimony to the Lord for 18 months, He will bless and enrich my life in ways I can’t yet see. Through the power of the atonement, He will enable me to be more forgiving, become more understanding, and to love and see the people of Arkansas the way He loves and sees them.
I don’t know what to expect on a mission because I’ve never been on one. But I am excited to experience the trials and hardships that Heavenly Father will place in my path. I am excited because I know that with the help of the Atonement, I will be molded into the daughter of God Heavenly Father knows I want to be. The atonement will empower and strengthen me in the times I feel I can’t do it anymore. It will allow me to fix my many, many mistakes. It will comfort me in the loneliness of times.
